My Wife Can’t Cook, But She Can “Assemble”

That is her word, and it is actually fairly accurate. I am unsure of the boundary between cooking and assembling, although the margins are pretty obvious. For instance, she can make a mean grilled-cheese sandwich — just don’t ask her to make a Croque-Monsieur; the béchamel is far beyond her capabilities.  But a few days ago we picked up a great looking eggplant (I guessed correctly and got a male with no seeds) although without any idea what I was going to do with it. I thought about slicing it thin and grilling it, and my lovely wife ran with that idea and suggested a sort of eggplant Napoleon, with tomato and mozzarella. So I did the heavy lifting at the grill, and she assembled the little eggplant towers, and even tossed in some fresh basil. We baked them for a few minutes, and then hit them with the broiler just to be sure that the cheese was gooey and browned. A resounding success! I will have to think about seasoning more carefully next time (thyme? more salt? oregano? garlic?), but the assembly algorithm is set. She will, of course, crow about her victory, and I will smile benevolently and ask for help with slicing the raw chicken, which will drive her screaming from the kitchen.

2 Replies to “My Wife Can’t Cook, But She Can “Assemble””

  1. probably my most favorite aspect of your blog: no pictures.

    thank you. seriously. nothing is more boring then a bunch of pictures with thoughtless commentary. thoughtful commentary and no pictures are always preferable.

  2. Oh damn! I was just about to post an entry with 17 photos of plates that I ordered in a nondescript Chinese restaurant. And each would be accompanied by a one or two word comment.

    Seriously, thank you for the compliment. I began to blog in part because I enjoy writing. My photography skills, especially in the context of food, would detract from what I hope is interesting commentary about my favorite things. And, I think that many bloggers use photos to fill up space. That is lazy at best, and disingenuous at worst.

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